Paint A Portrait Of My Mystery.

It’s so bizarre how a simple conversation helps me find the closure I’ve been looking for all semester. Same thing happened with a different boy last semester. Reality catches up with me and I realize my fantasy of love is not practical. God, I just wanted to sing and dance in the rain. The most ironic thing is I managed to that with said boy. But it meant nothing because he should mean nothing. I’m not scared to lose people. It’s college and that’s just a part of life. You see some people less and meet more impressionable ones. But the memories are still sweet (bittersweet) and I’m forever grateful for the little infinity given to me in the numbered days. Thank you. Yes, I just referred to John Green. Goodnight

There should be a big circle of people on Tumblr who dedicate themselves to following back/ not lying about it.

Then the outcasts can be the unfollowers.

I’ll finally get my revenge muahahahaha.

What’s that? Get a life.

This is my life, my dear. My pathetic life :)

Follow me and I’ll follow you back until forever (forever only ends if you unfollow me first).

I always follow back! Promise :)

http://sumahaq.tumblr.com/

Like I need to be loved.

Beauty is irrelevant.

I’m 18. I’m in college. I discovered the Internet a long time ago.

Enough said.

Also. BAHAHHAHA. You’re too cute, old man. “Bedtimes”  bahahhahah. I’ll stop.

It’s kinda pathetic how I secretly used to read at night. And last night I read The Fault In Our Stars.

It influenced my dreams.

The boy that I’m trying to not like… Well I hook up with him in my dream, get some red & black tattoo, then ask for his watch so I could dress up like a character in a book. AHEM.

Weird thing is SPOILER ALERT. Aajdajfkhs,fhskjHazelandGushookedupanditwasoneofthelastthingsIreadAJFBKJABASGB.

I’m not sure how to explain it. But I almost felt like I was lucidly dreaming.

And the hooking up with said boy. It was satisfying yet so so bizarre. Because in the dream right after I hook up with him and leave…I text my best friend saying I finally got a boyfriend. Bahahhahahahhaha.

God, I’m so pathetic. Forever alone <3

With the idea of you. It’s not rejection I feared. It’s not taking a chance to see the real you. It’s giving up and not knowing what I give up. But I feel relieved. Like, you kinda fucking suck. I will not wait for you. I will not chase after you. I refuse to be that desperate and clingy girl. My feminazi bitch ways may be back. But, I’m so happy. I need someone who can actually give a shit. You’re reckless and careless. I’m naive and cautious. There’s no need for a friendship. Shame, all that time wasted thinking about you. Have fun with your life. Enjoy figuring things out. Because I will enjoy figuring out what I need instead of what I want. I don’t need you. Goodbye.

You make me believe love isn’t real.